Sports Mentality

I grew up in a small town.  And like most small towns, sports were a big deal.  I've heard people say sports are intense in small towns.  But I would contend that the intensity of a sport in a small town is nothing compared to the intensity found in a suburb.  My son is in the 6th grade which is still part of elementary school here.  And we've already known of families who have hired a personal trainer to help their kid improve his pitch . . . or decided to "home school" religion (i.e., learn it in the car) to allow more time on the court, field or baseball diamond . . . or allow their child to tell the teacher they'll have to take a poor grade on last night's homework because they had a swim meet and didn't have time for their school work.

Is it just me or are these people crazy?  I keep thinking we'll eventually find the normal people out there (assuming of course, we're "normal" and all these sports nuts are the crazy ones).  But maybe they're the norm these days and WE'RE the odd ones.  So I have to ask, how do I keep ending up in these conversations? I go to a sport practice and like always, questions pop into my mind, so I ask someone who looks knowledgeable.  And before I know it, the person is detailing the sacrifices their family makes so their child can pursue this sport.  And I feel overwhelmed.

I thought I was a sport nut.  I thought I'd make sacrifices to succeed.  But I don't think I have what it takes.  I can't for the life of me seem to dredge up a passion to have one of my four children in one activity 4+ nights a week.  Sure we run 4+ nights a week, but that's because we have 3 children in things and we're spread between them.  But our activities include church and music as well as a sport.  And I worry that we're over scheduled and constantly assess whether this or that activity is adding or taking away from the life we value.  I can't make myself want every minute of our life to be spent at an activity.  I want time when all of us are here, at home.  When do these sport families hang out together?  When do they talk?  When do they play a game?  When do they eat dinner as a group?

I don't think I have what it takes to make it in this modern suburban world.  I miss my little town where you didn't start a sport until Junior High.  It was free.  You practiced after school, but were always home for dinner with your family.  No one even mentioned college until your Junior year in high school and certainly not in reference to a sports scholarship.  Sports were fun.  You learned teamwork.  Everyone was allowed on the team and everyone played at least a few minutes.  It's not like that here.  It's intense and it's intense early.  And I feel bad for my kids because they'll never have the type of experience I had.  And I have to wonder if they'll grow up loving or hating sports.  I can't stop hoping that somehow, despite all the "crazies" around here, my kids will love sports like I love them.  That they'll learn we win together or we lose together.  That they'll know what it's like to belong to a team and feel the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat that often ends up building more character than it's happier counterpart.

My children aren't jaded yet, but if they become that way, I won't be surprised.  And I've concluded that I simply need to stop talking to the knowledgeable people at practices.  They are knowledgeable because they've already dedicated their life to something that doesn't deserve that type of attention.  I feel sorry for them because they truly believe this sport or that sport is important.  When in reality, all of this will only last a few years and then it will be gone.  And all their kids will have at the end of it is worn out young bodies and burned out emotions.